Sometimes I feel so pressured. Like the whole world is looking at me. Are they? I accept my role as a leader, as a follower of Christ, as someone who is to be a reflection of Him. At times that role seems too much. I press on.
I feel like people are constantly watching me. If I mess up, the whole world gasps and looks at me with shame. Obviously that's not true, but it feels that way. Emotions are not facts, they are mere feelings. I must remind myself.
One of my greatest fears is that people will follow me more than they will follow God. Don't look at me and think that this, my life, is the way all Christian lives must be lived. It's not. God has a unique plan for us all. Everyone is not called to Africa or Haiti. Everyone is not called to be a pastor (however we are all called to be a minister of the Word, but that's a different thing). Everyone is not called to be _______ fill in the blank. My life is no more anointed than yours. If you accept the calling of God you'll see that. Everyone can be obedient, however everyone who is called won't be obedient to that calling.
I am not perfect, only forgiven.
Perspective changes things. A lot of things. For example, yesterday was a little rocky. While getting ready to throw myself a pity party I had a thought that could only have come from the Holy Spirit and He said to me, "So one person may not like you. That's nothing compared to the girl being sold into sex trafficking right now." Boom! That broke my heart and me.
Something God is teaching me is that my life is best lived with the focus off myself. Looking to Him first, and then, to others. I'm slowly learning that when I encounter a worry or a problem, I need to pray to God for guidance and help, ask others to pray for me, and then ask others how I may for them. Too much of the world is focused on the 'me' factor. That will not be my life. I said goodbye to the world and I will not go back. I will love and care for the people around me and not because I need to, not because I'm better than anybody else, but because Christ lives in me and He loves everyone. Only by Him am I able to do anything. Period.
A reminder to you today, even if yesterday wasn't the ideal beginning to 2012 you wanted, every day is a day for change. A day to be more who God has made you to be and you cannot do that without Him and His help. Let today be better than yesterday. Let Him move and work in you. May your love for Him not depend upon your circumstances, but because you love Him because He first loved you. Have a blessed day, beautiful people! :)