I don't know how I feel about this.
What's the "this" I'm speaking of? Let me start from the beginning...
"I finally understand what it looks like to be a follower of Christ!! It's more than I thought it would be... it actually takes work, but this work is worth it."
I remember saying these words over and over to others (because I was that excited!) and to myself. It was somewhere between breaking up with someone God didn't intend for me to be with and hearing my current pastor preach for the first time.
I didn't know life looked radical when lived for Christ... it does.
Sure, people expect Christians to go on mission trips, feed the homeless, and all that good (great!) stuff. But they don't expect you to swallow your pride, empty your heart, and lift hands up to the One who made them simply stating, "I surrender." ... and you mean it.
For about a year and a half God has really dealt with me on denying myself and following Him. He has shown me that taking up my cross daily is not an option when walking with Him. That's why Luke 9:23 is on the sidebar of my blog. That's my verse. That's the verse God stamped my heart with last year and has continued to since.
So you're pretty much caught up to where I am now... this thought right here: I don't know how I feel about this.
The this I'm talking about is this comfort level, look out for yourself, never radical; faith in Christ.
You think I'm pointing fingers and you're right but I'm pointing at myself. I was disgusted yesterday when I was examining life this past month and realized that really I was only focused on myself, not the Lord, not others, not the needs that are floating through the air of each and every person's life on earth... nope just on myself.
I found myself sitting happily in my house around 2 in the afternoon the other day and not having spent time with my Savior. It didn't really bother me. It scared me.
I'm around a lot of people who tell me to just go with the flow and deal with life for me first- get an education, good job, nice husband, cute house, have __ kids, etc, then go help others. How do I feel about that? Well, I don't like it. It tastes gross in my mouth and it's not what I want to do (sharing Christ all over the world is where my heart resides). But these people are my friends.. some are even Christians.
I guess you could say I'm confused about why we claim to follow this Jesus whom other Christians die for on a daily basis, like physically they die and yet we in America, we say to sit pretty and deal with life as it comes to you not worrying about anybody but yourself. I'm not condemning because as many Christians I know who live that way, I know just as many who actually live out their faith in all things.
What do you guys think? Should we sit comfortably in our pretty houses with our nice cars and our fridge full of food or do you think there's more to following Christ and that quite possibly that's not the "abundant life" He spoke of?
I agree with the latter.
Simply put, I believe in a God who made the whole world so why would I serve Him as if I was the boss and He was just along for the ride? Yeah dude, there's not too much trust in that... or faith.
Today I did something that scared me.
Something that God said I needed to do but I was afraid and didn't do it for a couple days thinking of as many "valid" excuses as possible (they were all lame by the way). I finally did it and you know what? It was fine. Nothing bad happened and it was cool.
My whole point is this: it's scary when we start trying to make things more agreeable as Christians just for the sake of being liked or being comfortable. Shouldn't the motivation be so God be glorified and others come to know this beautiful life in Jesus? Yes, it should. You might think I'm being "overly Christian" but I know Jesus saved me from this life of worthlessness and living only for me or relying only on me and because I know that I seriously want others to know that He did the same for them and they need to accept it as the gift it is.
He died for you so you could live for Him and while it's scary and hard and annoying at times, it's also the best, most beautiful story ever written to live. I mean really and truly live. It's indescribable.
Don't be afraid or embarrassed to live completely all out for Him. Do the things He's asking you to do whether they seem weird to others or not because I bet when you see Jesus face to face it won't matter anymore. He loves you. I do too.
Stay blessed, friends!