Sometimes the lies are just so loud the truth is hard to discern. Salty tears sweep your face because all you can think is, did I eat that? Am I really gross to everyone like I am to myself? What does God think of me? Am I disgusting to Him?
And no matter how many times someone quotes Psalm 139 to you, you just struggle to believe it over and over and over again. It's a vicious cycle really because you have periods where you can't get enough Psalm 139. You believe it firmly and shout it to everyone you know.
But sometimes the fog pools over and numbness and fear and hurt and pain settle in and then what?
You pray for help through the fog and the pain. You pray for help believing when it's hard. You pray for strength to realize your value is so much greater than your pants size or how much of a stomach you have. You pray for help in not only ignoring the lies, but in believing the truths.
And when you're done, sweetie, pray some more. Because we can never reach a point where we'll regret praying to our Lord and we can never reach a point where our prayers are pointless. Believe that. <3