9.25.2014

Let go, fix your thoughts, get over yourself, and rest (what I've learned)

Today I cried. I cried because anxiety had me bent double and the thoughts in my head were swirling so greatly... all in the wrong direction.

They don't like me.

I'm so out of place.

I don't belong anywhere.

Nobody wants me.

Nobody loves me.

The problem? Everything revolves around me. My thinking is too much about me. My mindset is: how can I please me? What makes me happy? What do people think of ME?

Then there's God.

Do people see HIM in me? Is HIS love made known through me even when the insecurities are thriving? Does HE get the praise through the good and the bad?

My mom gave me great advice today. She said, 'Don't let those problems ruin your time today. Let them go.' Amen. And I cried sobbed for 10 minutes after. I told God, I don't know how to let go. But slowly, one breath at a time, one intentional moment after another, thankfulness sprouted and peace... however little, made a home in my heart.

So, yes, I am an overly emotional, heart-on-her-sleeve, somewhat over-reacts drama queen/diva at times, but it's not about me. It's about Him. It's about Cristo. Today, I'm reminded to let go, place my thoughts on Him, get over myself, and rest. Thank You, Jesus, for the encouragers in my life.

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